March edition 2010
Story #1: Students Place in Speech Tournament
1.) The Speech and Debate team was invited to Richard D. King Annual Youth Speech Contest put on my Niles Rotary on Thursday, Feb. 4 at Washington Hospital.
2.) This lead doesn’t directly state the main part of the story, which is that the WHS students placed first and third in the competition.
3.) The Speech and Debate team participants placed in the top four positions at the Richard D. King Annual Youth Speech Contest put on my Niles Rotary on Thursday, Feb. 4 at Washington Hospital.
4.) My lead directly states the main part of the story – WHS students placed in top four positions at the tournament.
Story # 2: High School Relationships Lack Longevity
1.) High School relationships may be fun and exciting, but are they going to end in marriage?
2.) This lead is a question. Leads aren’t supposed to be questions.
3.) The chances that the fun and exciting high school relationships will end up in marriage are quite slim.
4.) My lead directly states the “thesis” of the article without posing a question.
Story #3: Chutney Spices it Up
1.) Chutney, a delicious new Pakistani and Indian restaurant, is located on 3352 Mowry Avenue.
2.) The lead, overall, seems bland. The main problem is with the second part after the comma, which states the address of the place. I think it’s not that hard to find the address of a place, but if stated, it should be later on in the story. The first impression of the restaurant, or just overall impression should be stated instead of the restaurant. (Maybe the amount of daily customers on average.)
3.) Chutney, a delicious new Pakistani and Indian restaurant, attracts an average of 75 customers a day. (This is made-up, but something along this should be the lead.)
4.) My lead states the first impression + an important characteristic of the restaurant, which gives an idea to the audience about how many individuals attend the place on average.
Story #4: From the Rack to the Boutique
1.) Have you searched all over the department stores for that perfect prom dress and still have not found anything that you like?
2.) Once again, this lead is a question.
3.) If you’ve searched all over the department stores for that perfect prom dress and still have not found anything that you like, there are alternatives.
4.) My lead is not a question, and leads on to the next sentence by implying that the article gives suggestions.
